No products in the cart.
Return To Shop
The Biggest Challenge for ‘Secret’ Cross-Dressers
Swanky Pins have a large percentage of buyers who are male wearers, many of which keep their CD activities a secret from their wives/girlfriends/family and who want to buy lingerie discreetly.
I personally take a lot of calls from guys who buy lingerie for themselves, far more male customers contact by telephone than women as they seem to like to talk about their cross-dressing as well as ask advice about sizing ect. Most callers are married, with children/grand-children and have been keeping their secret for years – it seems the majority would clearly like to be a bit more ‘open’ but have no-one they can really talk to so it can often be a lonely experience.
Apparently, the biggest problems cross-dressers face are: how to choose the right size for the male figure (which we have covered in a separate post – Suspender Belts for Men), how to pay without leaving ‘evidence’, and where to have it discreetly delivered.
Shining a Light on Ordering & Delivery
There are very few high street shops where men can buy lingerie for themselves without feeling, or being made to feel, more than a little awkward. However, ordering online can also present difficulties as many CD’s don’t want to take the chance of wives seeing the purchases on their bank or credit card statements, or having lingerie delivered to the house or office.
We have had many ‘cash on collection’ male wearing customers over the past few years, some driving over a 4 hour round trip to collect their lingerie and pay in cash, so the purpose of this post is to try and get some feedback in order to devise a solution that our cross-dresser customers who are not local enough to do this would be happy with.
Customers have asked to send cash through the post which is okay with us but far from ideal for the buyer as if it gets lost we cannot take responsibility for the loss.
We are hoping to sign a deal with a click and collect service which will be available soon which would solve the issue of discreet deliveries (provided there is an outlet locally), but we are still left with issues regarding payment for those who don’t want to leave a paper trail.
If anyone has any ideas about this, please do let us know.
Why do men Cross-Dress?
Because of the prejudice that exists around crossdressing, most people don’t have any first hand experience so assume that men cross dress for sexual pleasure, but in many cases it is just that cross-dressers feel comfortable rather than sexually aroused when they wear the clothing of the other sex.
There are of course those that dress up in women’s lingerie for sexual purposes although most are heterosexual, not gay or perverted. The inclination to crossdress is not something most men have control over, it is a just a component of their full identity that has probably been with them from a very young age.
Keeping secrets like this from their partners can be difficult and in itself stressful as most of us want to be accepted for who we are, not judged by what we choose to wear.
Take the example used on British soap Eastenders where undertaker Les Coker hid his cross-dressing alter-ego ‘Christine’ from wife Pam for many years and when it did come out she was horrified. Les attempted to explain it by saying ‘You know how stressed I get,’ I’m surrounded by grief all day. It gets to me. Sometimes I need not to be a man.’
Men like this don’t try to ‘pass’ as women, and just dress up to enjoy feeling feminine, removing the pressures of having to be the strong, competitive, assertive male and is far more common than most of us think.
The feelings of needing to cross-dress at certain times can be strong and compelling and many men do it without really knowing why.
We find the most popular lingerie styles for men are suspender belts (deep styles as these stay put on the waist better than the flimsy 4 strap ‘fashion’ belts), pantyhose/tights and stockings with corselettes/slips a close second, but purchases have also included girdles, waspies, bodystockings and even fishnet dresses. Style seems to have a lot to do with whether the wearer is a fetish and non-fetish crossdresser.
If any of you men would like to have their photos added to this article, please email us your images and we will be happy to include them.
Banish Cross-Dressing prejudice – understanding is a far healthier emotion than disgust, horror or shame.
About author
Related posts
Creating a 1950s-inspired look is all about embracing the vintage charm and iconic styles of that era.Styling the look starts at the bottom – with... Continue reading
A multi-strap suspender belt, also known as a garter belt, is a lingerie accessory that is worn around the waist to hold up stockings. It... Continue reading
Burlesque or Pin-up – how are they different? To the untrained eye, burlesque and pin-up can often be mistaken for the same thing. But the... Continue reading
Do women only wear lingerie for sex? There’s a common misconception (by men) that gorgeous lingerie is worn purely for their benefit or for sex... Continue reading
We have written this article in response to the number of queries we receive from both men and women along the lines of “My Compression... Continue reading
49 comments on “The Biggest Challenge for ‘Secret’ Cross-Dressers”
Sean
Thank you sooooo much for posting this article! I am a crossdresser myself from “across the pond”, over here in the United States. It wasn’t until late October of last year that I finally admitted to & accepted the fact that yes, I am indeed a CD. It’s something that has been a part of me since I was very young, and I carried that secretive burden for almost 35 years, out of fear that I would be rejected by friends and family alike for my womanly ways.
My wife now officially knows of my secret, which first started as an argument over why I spent $70-something on eBay for what I thought was a gorgeous turtleneck sweater dress (it’s mini-dress length, with a humongous 22″ collar….the longer the collar, the better!). She was initially hurt that I didn’t just come to her about it, but this is something that’s a major part of me & not everyone welcomes it with open arms. Since then though, she has given me various clothes — mostly bras and panties — and my stepdaughter has contributed also. My sister-in-law added to it by giving me my very first pair of heeled booties, a purse, and some other goodies and right now there’s a fight over as to who is going to give me my first makeup makeover!
So yeah, I’m definitely loving life as a CD, but most importantly I’m finally happy & comfortable in my skin for the first time ever. Like, wearing women’s clothing feels so right to me, and I have no intentions of actually ‘passing’ as a female…although I am curious how I’d look completely made over and such.
Thanks again for this blog! And I love the website, by the way!!
Swanky Pins
Hi Sean, Thank you for your comments and for sending us your photographs, 2 of which I have included here. I am glad to hear you are now able to live as you want to and it would be great if other guys with a similar story could happily follow your example. We hear of many men going through to old age without ever being able to tell anyone about their cross-dressing, which I think is really sad, must be quite a burden. Debbie
Sean
It really is a burden in not telling anyone, Debbie. I grew up in a time when men were men and women were women, and to hear of a guy dressing or wanting to dress in women’s clothing was automatically considered wrong or of homosexual behavior….even though sex and gender are two totally different things. I’m very much a heterosexual person but have just always wanted to crossdress, because the look and feel of female clothing always appealed to me — it just feels right, if that makes any sense. Even just wearing something simple like panties or tights underneath my work clothes, I much prefer to wear that instead of boxers.
Once I told my wife about my crossdressing tastes, it was as if the most enormous weight had been lifted. I could fully breathe again & not feel ashamed and afraid anymore of who I really am. And thanks for showing those two pictures, by the way…I never realized just how great my legs look!
(…and yes, I still have those thigh-high striped socks…)
Crespinrosales
I went through life keeping my secret a secret.. the first girl friend who discovered that I was a cross dresser she blew her mind and she yinto ..then rejection BIENG called gay.. well now I have finally found a lady who is totally into with me.. she is back east right now but she has sent me some sexy lingerie and some very sexy dresses and she wants me to model them for her..so I have found the Queen of all my dreams and fantasys and desires..so I am finally happy man
Angie
This guy wears stockings and garters every day except in very hot weather. Right now, I’m wearing Shop National beige stockings tightly fastened with a six strap garterbelt. I love everything about it. I love pulling on my garter belt and adjusting it. I love putting on my stockings, pulling them up my legs and fastening them to my garters. And I just love the gentle thigh massage from my stockings and motion of my straps as I move about. Fastening my garters is especially enjoyable. I have garterbelts with as many as sixteen straps and every on is a joy to fasten.
Charles 246
Hi Angie , I just feel the same pleasure by putting on daily my 6-fastener garter belt and nylon stockings .
Bill
I can relate to that
Although I only have 2 belts
Lee Graham
Wow go you. My wife doesn’t understand. I am open with her and I now cross dress (some) at home & at work. I don’t get too crazy with it at work. This has been going on since I was six or seven years old and then I thought it was cool but my dad ,my uncle and brother in law didn’t find if cool at all. This started my cd experiences. Fifty years later I still enjoy it privately
Steve
An excellent article. Men cross dress for as many reasons as women do and the appeal of lingerie is something stronger than that of the dull undies bestowed on men.
I know I prefer something soft around my bits and many guys do. You can’t make a y front of boxer sexy.
Stockings and pantyhose have a similar appeal but also a supporting roll.
Compression pantyhose are light enough to give everyday support and give tired legs relief. I have mine on now from my walk and wear them on long distance flights and wore them often when I work. The hosiery industry and fashion industry forget men have legs as well and it’s only fair. They are always hidden under ugly trousers.
Another service you could offer is bra fittings. Why you ask?
Gynecomastia or man boobs. Guys have them and are then embarrassed to seek out help to find proper supporting garments. But for that matter, many women also fail this.
Swanky Pins
Hi Steve,
I totally agree with your comments, women’s lingerie looks and feels much nicer than mens and I’m sure silky satin and lace is much more comfortable and sensual to wear against the skin – mens boxers don’t even come close. I read a very relevant comment recently that said ‘I say its comfort dressing not cross dressing’.
If we were a ‘bricks & mortar’ shop (maybe in the future:), we would definitely offer bra fitting for both men and women, although I don’t know how many British men would walk in and request one. Perhaps Aussie men are bit more relaxed about things like that. Many women I know have never had a proper bra fitting yet we all know it is important to get one for a perfect fit. Unfortunately as on online only shop, it’s not possible to offer the service right now.
Our motto: If you like it – wear it!
Michael
Really enjoyed reading your blog.
I wear panties and camisoles daily, and sometimes matching bralette.
Panties provide superior comfort, male underwear does not .
Good to see other people embrace the same thinking.
Crespin
I have been crossdressing since I was ten..my Aunt had a shop that also sold Lingerie and I would stay over every week end and hang with my cousin while aunt n uncle went to Vegas every weekend.n my cousin would leave until my aunt return home..so I would have the whole house to myself and bieng that my Aunt’s shop was connected to the house I was able to go into her shop and get what ever I wanted to wear..I would grab a white lace garter belt and a pair of white lace panties and camisole then a pair of white lace top stockings and a pair of heels..I was in heaven dressing up and just walk around the house in my five inch STRAPPY heels ..just enjoying my time…well now I’m fiftyeight and still dress up in sexy lingerie and heels and mini skirts .. well I met a old friend and we started talking about us well she told me that she knew about my fetish and it has always turned her on m.well now we are engaged and she loves me in sexy lingerie and be her girlfriend..life is Awesome now
Joe
Lucky guy
VMW
I am the girlfriend of a cross dresser. I initially met him openly knowing he wore lingerie. We have been together for just over a year. I have fostered his femininity and love this lifestyle he and I have. It is based on such honesty that at my age of 48 has been the best relationship I have ever encountered. He now has someone to share it with and not hide who he is. He trusts me because I am the keeper of a secret that has been hidden from the world since he was a young boy. It has been so fulfilling to give him this gift of acceptance. I’ve never met a more beautiful soul in or out of sexy lingerie 🙂
nick
Hi im a male and i love wearing bodystockings , tights , i look good in them
rpandmp4ever
Thank you so much! Ive searched for so long to find any kind of site that would allow me to share not only my pics but also the fact that i crossdress. I was with my girlfriend ( of 11 years) 3 years before i even started crossdressing. It took 6 years for me to find a way to tell her. Awkward at first. Accused of being gay. But now we buy underwear together. She knows i wear lingerie, like bustiers, stockings, garters, bodystockings, but i she acts like thats a little too fiminine so i still wear them in privat.
James Yuille
I do wish my wife was this accepting.
red
how do you cross dress with your wife
JB
I love wearing lingerie as it feels nice and makes me feel comfortable in myself and sexy.
Tho I still have hangups as I hide it from everyone , I only wish it could be more open and accepted. But I grew up in a world where it wasn’t.
I’d send a pic but don’t know how.
Swanky Pins
Hi JB,
I you would like to send us a photo, email it to [email protected] and we’ll put it up. Debbie
Corrine
In my youth used to be a lead singer in a band, used to do the university circuit and warm-up support sessions for the more popular groups and solo artists. Then having discovered business opportunities I left music behind. More recently I’ve got back into singing which has led me into burlesque which is a blast, I get to wear sexy outfits, great lingerie and work with wonderful co-performers.
I have placed a number of orders from this site even when I’ve thought no I should not by anything more, but my girly desires won out and I kept going back to the website for more. I’ve worn each purchase out and been complimented by both ladies and guys alike.
These photos were taken at 3:40AM after a huge party when I was not at my best. I’m wearing my Swanky Pins 6 strap boned waspie with sheer mesh vintage style robe which I am very happy with. Corrine Driscoll (my performer name).
Swanky Pins
We want to thank the lovely Corrine Driscoll for her support, purchases and the lovely reviews she has left on each product she has bought from us. Debbie
Bill k
Have been a cd for years but have never found a friend that I could talk about my kink. It makes things lonely.
Wearing feminine lingerie or indeed going whole hog in dress and stockings feels soooo good.
Its not mainly sexual, more the lingerie fits so comfortably, and feels so good against my skin ( I am blessed with having a virtually hairless smooth body. Nair takes care of the pubic area.)
Of course there is also the “naughty ” secret aspect of being a cd. Love it.
Nina/John
Hi Bill Same situation here. The whole “dressing” experience is a great rush so when I get the opportunity to slip into heels and a baby doll with nice stockings it’s an amazing way to relax.
Regards
John
Stacey
Well honey you can talk to me about it I love the wear my girlfriends lingerie and sneak into her bedroom when she’s not home and sit in front of her make up mirror and put on her make up just like she would before she goes out. She has 36D boobs and I purchased the same size fake boobs that look real and feel real and look real to the touch you cannot tell them from hers and I so love the naughty part of it because you feel so feminine and looking in the mirror and having my make up done professionally and my nails and my hair I will do a popper and go to a Gloryhole and the rest is history
Kate
I’m the girlfriend of a CD, it was a shock at first because I have known him since we were in preschool. We are in our early 40’s and 8 months apart. I caught him talking to other males, I was heartbroken thinking this would never happen to me. I have loved him since I was 12 years old. I have a sexually colorful past and can and in no way would judge him in anyway. I find it is such a turn on. I want to feel him in his panties bra and leggings. He chooses not to fully open up to me and it breaks my heart the secrets he keeps. I love him more than he could ever know. I did buy him some panties to replace the ones found and threw out. He even kind of picked them out. I put them in a box with notes and a little scavenger hunt for him to find them. He opened the box and they have just sat in there for 2 months. Yet he still hides from me and talks to men online and plays with his toys in secret. I want to share his world because I know it will bring us closer together.
John
Loved reading your blog. I’ve been crossdressing for years loving my high heels,stockings and suspenders, your site is wonderful I adore everything I see,hope you ship to Australia!
Like most CDs I’d need some sizing advice on those fabulous girdles and bras thank you for a fabulous blog.
Regards
Nina/John
Sydney
Swanky Pins
Hi Nina/John, Great to hear you like our website & products and yes we do ship to Australia. Debbie
Nina
Thanks! Love your Instagram page too.
Nina
Tom Sleifer
Society for many many years has labeled certain articles of clothing for males and for females. To me personally various articles of chothing should never be labled for women for males. If a male or a women sees the benefits that of a girdle bra hose skirt it really doesn’t matter and clothing should never be labeled, there are real benefits of being girdled or in bra hose skirt etc, and it really doesn’t matter your sex.
Back during the 40s, 50s, 60s and into the 70s and 80s women were always dressed in skirts, times have changed and women started to wear what was labeled as for men only pants. Nowadays when you go out you see women in pants. That again is a societal thing labeling clothing which society really shouldn’t do. If you are a woman and you happen to like pants wear pants, if you say you are a man and you happen to like skirts wear skirts – it really shouldn’t matter and articles of clothing should never be labeled.
Crespin
I am the luckiest man in the world..I have been searching for so long n now I have found the QUEEN OF ALL MY DREAMS DESIRES AND FANTAZIES .. SHE LOVES PICKING ME SOMETHING TO WEAR WE ALSO LOVE ROLE PLAYING SO NOW SHE HAS A GIRLFRIEND..I HAVE FINALLY FOUND THE LADY I HAVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT ALL MY LIFE
Pete
Imagine telling a female she couldn’t wear something that’s considered masculine???? You’d be crucified! (Mysogynist, sexist, Pervert, etc)
However, Society deems it ok to dictate what men can’t wear and that men who wear lingerie are “weirdos”
Luckily when my wife found out about me she was shocked but largely understanding. It’s such a shame that men have to hide their lingerie andthat it could lead to the breakdown of a family especially when you consider it’s just clothing… literally just under wear. stupid or what?
I explained to my wife I had no interest in wearing until she suggested it and I tried it in secret as I was too nervous to do it with her watching in case she thought less of me as a man and that when I did, I discovered that I found it liberating, relaxing and sexy!
I just discovered this site through a post on Quora from Debs and due to her mature attitude can expect orders from me in future.
signed Pete a straight married manly man
PS Since giving up on societies expectations of me, my wife and I are now closer than ever and spend more quality time together including doing stuff that “men” shouldn’t do.
Thomas/Samantha
I’ve now been crossdressing for 26 years (current age-30). My crossdressing experience I had was with my mother, I have 3 sister’s and all my mother wanted was all girls or 2 boys and 2 girls. Ever since I was able to do laundry by myself, I took the cutest panties and pantyhose after I was done drying them, that’s when my mind was made up, to become a crossdresser.
Since then my friends knew that I was wearing something feminine but can’t never prove it, my cousin also say I’m gay, this, that and the third, which I use to get mad at him. When I was 27 years old I started to buy, not just panties and pantyhose only, I went into dresses and skirts, then makeup, which I had noticed that I didn’t feel right like something was missing, I put my head down, after looking at myself in the mirror and I couldn’t figure out what was missing, I bowed my head down in disappointment at myself and then it dawn on me, I wasn’t wearing women’s shoes of any kind, so I got into buying women’s heels, ballet flats, flat sandals, wedges and sneakers, I wear more flats, wedges and heels then sneakers. Just like every woman they have one thing in common and that’s what they continue to buy, like your motto: “if you like it, wear it,” and that’s exactly what I do, I buy shoes to go with outfits and in the same time I’m looking for other shoes that I can put a quick outfit together and that’s it, when women goes shopping they buy things that they will never wear a dress they just give away.
When I had turn 30 (today Jan 5th, 2019, I said you know what? keeping secrets from my friends wasn’t a healthy friendship then I had the “fuck its” meaning I didn’t care who saw me dressed as a woman (which if I put makeup on while taking my time, I could pass as a woman.”
My niece comes to me for ideal outfits to match, my niece’s girlfriend had asked for tips and advice from my opinion and point of view. Now I have a lovely young lady that I took under my wing telling her buy it, if it’s pants make sure you have white, blue, burgundy and black, just one pair, before you walk out the door and get home and feels like you don’t match, make a matching set before any purchases so you can see for yourself if you match. Try with the shoes that you chose see from head to toe if it matches. She went on about makeup, I told her if you’re not sure about what color your couture and foundation should be there’s no shame in any game to keep your natural skin color, eyeshadow you can go a little off the wall (like if you have pink on keep it pink bit different shades) but keep in the color range of what you are wearing. You dont want to over power other colors, they supposedly support the colors on your clothing and makeup.
For 30 years I’ve been a bigger sister and I would like to be remembered I’m the crossdresser that said F@#$ it and went out looking like a woman and my female friends and family (except one) accepted me and treats me as one of the ladies/girls. The best part is that I can choose to keep my manly parts with no gender surgery, I wear women’s clothing comfortable 24 hours a day and 7 days a week. My aunt is against my decision (she think I just started to crossdresser and she is highly against it, told her the samething F@#$ it/you). So far she’s not completely against her policy, but when you die, I will still have the final say in my life and I have to live with the decisions that I decided to do with my life and body (clothing). So she knows I wear jewelry, she knows about the makeup, but don’t know that I’m also bisexual (won’t tell her that).
I’m Thomas and to most people (that wouldn’t be a judgemental jerks) I’m named Samantha, and some family and friends do called me by that name. I’ve been looking for a place, “blog” to express my experiences with the general public, that wearing something materialistic doesn’t consider that you’re gay and people that are calling men gay is wrong and they should be gay. I have straight men asking me for a one night stand…… Nope, sorry I’m not a hooker, slut, a whore that can be taken lightly and I don’t like to repeat myself (only one word that’s does describe me) if I do that’s when the bitch (worse than a woman on their personal monthly thing) comes out.
People like thinking sideways or up and down tryna figure you out and cant, I’ll make this really easy and simple, if you see a guy dressed in women’s clothing, do you still say hi sir or ma’am? To the crossdresser he might think you insulted him by calling him sir after you saw what he or she is wearing. I go a speeding ticket and the question he asked me how do I identify myself? What? What type of question is that? I said officer what do you see that I’m wearing, he said women’s clothing. I turned back around to avoid putting chi g him in the face for asking such a dumba#$ question like I identify myself. Simple way I answered him saying you see women’s clothing right that means you address them according to the clothing on their backs, if they have men’s clothing I think you address them as sir. Cops dum because the powder off those poisoned donuts, lmfao.
First picture is how I was dressed and deciding which shoes to go with, second picture was from one the girls taking it and the last one is a picture of my legs in the shoes I chose to wear to hangout with the girls, they didn’t a man (any man) that has a sense of fashion until now, that was one of the questions they asked they asked what size pants am I and told them I lost weight cause I lost a size went from size 5 to size 4, and yes you can say I’m trying to portray as a female, but not really, I just look younger than my real age.
Your Partner In Helping Others In Need,
Thomas Rivera (Prefer to be called) Samantha S. Rivera
Mark wilson
What a great summary.
I read your post on Quora, and had to have a look at your site.
Reading all this, has made me realise that i am not weird, or alone.
I love to wear stockings, suspenders, and panties. For me , its a sensual, liberating feelin.
At 49, divorced, why not do what i enjoy doing?
Next on my shopping list is a basque, or waspie. Long may my “wearing” continue.
Mark
Swanky Pins
Hi Mark and thank you for your comments. Well you’re not weird and as approximately 40% of our customers are male wearers you certainly not alone. We believe this is because the deeper retro style girdles and suspender belts that we sell are more suited to male figures than the flimsier ‘modern’ styles which tend to slip down over their hips.
Gemma Newham
I have been crossdressing since I was about 15 in private. I have never dressed in front of my parents and I know that if my Dad had ever caught me there would have been hell to pay. I lost my father over 10 years ago and shortly after my mother was diagnosed with dementia. So I had to retire early to be her carer. As we lived together we rarely ever went out but had a lovely life together. I dressed one night and came down stairs and to my amazement my mother said how lovely I looked and she had suspected for years. From that day on I dressed in front of her and she was quite accepting about it. It also helped me to relax after caring for her. Sadly she is no longer with us anymore, but I continue to dress as I live alone and it helps me to feel my true self and relax after a long day. I used to try to give it up but I have finally accepted that my female self is much stronger than my male self and just let her exist fully. It was lovely to be accepted by my mother in her latter years and not to be seen as some kind of weird freak.
MIkie Neese
Like Mark, I love wearing my high waste open crotch pantyhose and stockings with one of my Waspie’s or one of the other clothing items like this I have. Also wearing thong underwear made for males. The comfort of having my parts cradled in a soft pouch that I can feel swinging around while walking around is great especially since the other way they are scrunched. I believe that I have a serious stocking and garter fetish. The more garters, the better. This extends into my self pleasuring too. My body shape wont allow for a garter belt so I started looking at Shapeware and Girdles with attached garters for my stockings. I have about 8 of these including 2 of the waspie’s sold here. In fact, I am ordering another one today. I also love my “shapeware” items and figure it is just part of my fetish. I put them on when I get up in the morning and take them off when I take my evening shower before bed. My legs feel great under my blue jeans and the waspie is a constant reminder that everything is there. Now I’m looking at Corsets as well. Using the “clip on” garter straps, I will still be able to wear my stockings. Corsets are even being designed and made for the male body shape. Since I bought these for me, they aren’t woman’s clothing. I’m 61, a respected Aerospace machinist, married and have 3 grown children. Nobody knows anything about what I have on under my clothing. Family, friend or coworkers. One coworker, standing behind me yesterday, asked me how my back was feeling these days since I was having trouble a few weeks ago. When I started to reply, I remembered that the waspie can be seen when my shirt gets pulled tight. Figure he saw it and thought it a back brace. I don’t feel or think I’m weird or anything like that. I just like wearing these clothing items. The secret part is great too.
Swanky Pins
We received the following message from a customer today and asked permissions to publish it here as contrary to most of the previous posts, he does cross-dress mainly for sexual pleasure, has no wife or girlfriend and has made the conscious decision to exclude women from his life because of his ‘obsession’ with lingerie. A very different story from the majority of other replies, we thought it may be of interest to readers.
“Hi Debbie,
I’ve just bought two lovely suspender belts from your shop, they were delivered to me today. Thank you for an extremely speedy delivery.
I have already tried both suspender belts. They fit perfectly, like a second skin around my waist and my hips. Thank you for your size guiding in your ad, it was most helpful. (Otherwise sizes may be hazardous; a size Large in one brand is not the same as a Large in another brand.)
I consider myself to be a crossdresser, not a transvestite. I have no desire to “become” a woman. To dress fully as a woman or to be apprehended as a woman by others. Sometimes I can dress in a skirt and a blouse, but most of the time I just dress in lingerie. And I never use a wig, never wear any make-up, never any female jewellery. Just lingerie, that’s enough for me.
To me, crossdressing is a sexual thing. I crossdress for having a sexual experience. To me, there is a strong connection between crossdressing and sexual pleasure. Consider this, I have never in my life experienced any sexual pleasure without being dressed in lingerie. So lingerie is an urgent necessity for me to achieve sexual pleasure. No lingerie – no pleasure. It’s as simple as that.
You may now wonder how this obsession goes with a relation to a woman. To a wife, to a girlfriend. Well, it doesn’t. Few women can stand a man in female lingerie. So I have decided to exclude women from my life. So I have done without a wife and a girlfriend. I’ve never been married, never been living with a woman, never had a girlfriend, not even a temporary one. I’ve been living alone all my life. Mostly to please myself sexually. By masturbation, by stroking my body with nylon lingerie and by using various “masturbation devices”.
But what about women? Have I never had sex with a woman? Sure, I have. But which kind of women will have sex with a perverted crossdresser in lingerie? Well, you know the answer. A prostitute. So I have turned to prostitutes. Many times. Numerous times. Still today I meet with my prostitute “girlfriends” once or twice a month. And they accept me in my lingerie.
So, dear Debbie, you asked for a feedback. I hope that this feedback hasn’t upset you or shocked you. That has not been my intention. I just want to bring you my immediate reactions from having your lovely suspender belts. And again, I’m more than pleased with them. (“Pleased” in more than one way. I’ve been dressed in your golden suspender belt while writing this letter.
I will look out for other objects in your lingerie shop Swanky Pins. One of the suspender belts I bought from you was a White 8 Strap Suspender Belt in Satin with White Lace Front”
With my best regards
Ulf Ekengren
Stockholm, Sweden
EdenFantasies
People like thinking sideways or up and down trying to figure you out and cant, so I’ll make this really easy and simple. If you see a guy dressed in women’s clothing, do you still say hi sir or ma’am? To the cross-dresser, he might think you insulted him by calling him Sir after you saw what he or she is wearing. I got a speeding ticket and the question he asked me was how do I identify myself? What? What type of question is that? I said officer what do you see that I am wearing, he replied ‘women’s clothing’. I turned back around to avoid putting chinning him in the face for asking such a dumba#$ question like how do I identify myself. The simplest way I could answer him was by saying ‘you see women’s clothing right? That means you address them according to the clothing on their backs, if they have men s clothing I think you address them as sir’. Cops are dumb because the powder off those poisoned donuts lmfao.
stumpypaul1947
hi everyone im Paul (paula). been crossdressing since the age of 10 It started with my mums underwear and progressed from there.I prefer to be called a transvestite.when im dressed its not all about sex its the feel of feminine attire undies and clothes.It so relaxing.i allso like to meet and have some naughty fun with othertv/xd. why oh why cant we wear what we want and not be abused or ridiculed.It was great to read all the articles from others like myself.So you all take care.and that goes for you as well Debbie
H **
Juliet Gee
An excellent article. So nice to find a supplier who is so supportive. I have been dressing for most of my life, I dress for my (not sexual) pleasure. I find the transformation so relaxing, I find that stress just disappears as I change. I do like to look as convincing as possible with wig and makeup. The feel of the silky material is so nice in comparison to my normal wear and to wear proper nylons is heavenly.
Quietgapshot
I am a, not so secret, crossdresser. I love to go out in tights and skirt or dress, with shoes or boots. I find that if I am confident with this myself that others around me are more at ease with it and so I have very few issues when out.
angie
I’ve been a strictly closet crossdresser for most of my life, and I’m 93 now. I wore garter stockings under my pants to my office for years. I wore nude or light beige stockings with a wide six strap garterbelt with the rear garters well to the back for good stocking support. I loved the gentle thigh massage from the stockings and tiny movement of the garter straps as I moved about. Now as I write, I’m wearing wonderful Shop National stockings with TWO six strap belts and really enjoying the tight stockings and tug of my garters. I’ve also gotten into layering and have worn up as many as FIVE pairs of stockings with over thirty garters I guess I’m a real garter nut.
Petra
Petra
Thank you swanky pins and to all who have written blogs. I also love crossdressing, I am lucky as my wife has now accepted my c/d For a while I did it in private. then she found out was not happy about it and after a while made me dispose my collection. but soon noticed a change in me, so after a good discussion she let me back c/d and saw a good change in me. We now go shopping to stores or online together, we are now both very comfortable together with it. So now I can openly be a c/d with her
Ronald
MY wife started me into Cross Dressing, she enjoyed making love with me cross dressed, she was wonderful, lost her to cancer.
spoozo
I started crossdressing at age ten or eleven. I was taking out our rubbish which included a laddered stocking and a tattered garterbelt. I hid them in my room and tried them on after lights out. Now retired, I dress up every day in stockings, garters and lingerie. Today, I’m wearing black fencenet stockings with a twelve strap garterbelt and racy half slip.
rachel
Having only just found your site, I’m sure I’ll be placing an order very soon as I love wearing stocking & suspenders
The 1st time I dressed as a woman it was out of total curiosity after my mother had left a bra & panties on my bed whilst sorting clothes that she’d washed etc. I’d always wondered about what it would be like to dress as a girl & trying them on & I had to go all the way, WOW I thought & several weeks later when my parents had gone away for the weekend, I found myself at my mother’s dressing table trying to put on makeup & Jewellery & soon I was looking at myself in her full-length mirror wearing a blouse & knee length skirt / high heels & a wig I had found. OMG I thought, I couldn’t see a 17 year old boy dressed as a girl, quite the opposite I could see a girl, & that girl was me thinking why hadn’t I been born a girl, I knew I had just set my real self-free, I felt totally at ease with myself, I couldn’t stop smiling as I felt so happy & the feel of nylon on my legs was amazing & as the aroma of perfume filled the air I didn’t want to change back into men’s clothes, soon I was buying my own make up, wigs & clothes etc. several years later I had a wardrobe of clothes shoes to rivel any girl. I’d dress whenever I could, & 1 day the inevitable happened, I was caught dressed as a schoolgirl, thinking I had the house to myself for several days as my parents were away with my younger brother & sister, I gone to town shaving my whole body & had spent ages doing my makeup & hair which I had now grown long it was far better than wearing a wig & after a long bath, I’d even put on red false nails & there I was wearing a white blouse with my old school tie, navy pleated miniskirt, black lace top stockings & suspenders that matched my bra & knickers, wandering about the house in my 4″ stilettos I felt great taking a few photos then I went outside, god how I love to hear the sexy clatter of my high heels on the garden path is indescribable, it’s just such an evocative sound filling my head with arousing thoughts & feeling the warm afternoon air on my stocking clad legs I was thinking how I would love to find the courage to walk out the garden gate & down the road, then suddenly I heard him say “well well who do we have here”, feeling a lump in my throat I knew I had to face the music at some point as he began laughing, I spun around to see my older brother stood there with a lewd grin on his face, even now I don’t know why but I replied in a soft feminine like voice “I’m Rachel” But now I’m glad I did as he took me to went to my bedroom, then looking at my dresses he suddenly passed me my blue & white floral print minidress & said put that on & come down stairs, doing as I was told I grabbed a handbag, I found myself been ushered to his car, Where are we going I said, I was astounded yet excited by the reply, I’m going drop you at one end of the park & then you can meet me at the other end, if you like dressing as woman so much you’ll want to do it, OMG I thought as he parked the car up, good luck I’ll see you in about 20 minutes he said as he drove off, feeling a little nervous as I placed my handbag over my shoulder & took a deep breath as I set off on now what I call my BIGGEST CHALLENGE, by the time I’d got to the other end of the park my initial uneasiness had turned to jubilation as I realized no one took real notice of me & I had 1 or 2 admiring glances, I’d even managed to smile at a guy who passed me & said “hi” to me, my brother stood waiting said judging by your smile you’ve enjoyed yourself, Yes I’m going enjoy wearing dresses & skirts now & I’ve found there’s more to dressing as a girl than hiding yourself away I said could you meet me at the other of the street I’m going walk a little further where there’s more people, I have do it for myself now, When we got home I kissed him on the cheek & thanked him for helping me come out of the closet, I spent the rest of the evening choosing which dress I was going be wear the next morning as I knew I wanted to be Rachel as soon as I got up & yes I’m still dressing years later having pulled a few guys on the way & god how it feels to made to feel like a woman by a real man who knows how treat & take advantage of a woman,
David
I am 59, married with a grown son, and have just discovered the absolute delights of wearing stockings and suspenders. I have worn male thongs and g strings for a couple of years and my wife just accepted this as an eccentricity, but I wouldn’t dream of telling her about my fetish for stockings and suspenders. Every day for the last week I have gone to work, gone out to dinner, shopping etc with my secret desire hidden away beneath my clothes. As others have mentioned, it’s the thrill of thinking ‘If only they knew’!
I have just bought an 8 strap suspender belt from this site and I can’t wait to try it on with a pair of sheer black seamed stockings.